GUESS WHO HAS SNIPPETS TO SHARE || Yes, I have very slowly made headway on "Ethandune," enough to toy with the notion that I may know what I am doing, and enough to have snippets to share with you all.
GENERAL UPDATE || I feel like death. The end. My anxiety is largely manageable, my insomnia is almost tolerable, my energy levels are non-existent, there have been stretches of days that I have felt completely hopeless of surviving, I spend most of my time resting or writing letters, + I'm now seriously starting to get the "nesting" fever regarding Wolfgang's room.
MY MUSIC RARELY COINCIDES WITH MY WRITING || Along with THREE letters all at once, my friend sent me a copy of Audrey Assad's album "Inheritance." It's beautiful + I'm loving it.
jesus, the very thought of you
it fills my heart with love
jesus, you burn like wildfire
and i am overcome
snippets of ethandune
We began to move forward with her, Dammerung at her side and myself a few paces behind, and we were seamlessly swept into her constellations of people and hydrangeas and shining furniture. For the most part, I saw, the people were women, fantastically clad, tall and slender and cream-coloured as new spear-shafts; one turned an eye to me as I passed, and the dart of her glance was like a weapon-head, a flicker of steel: I dampened my lips and expected to taste a prick of blood.
I saw the red-lit face, worn with stubble, look up and crease with a smile, half-covering a shiver that rankled along Goddgofang’s form. “Sometimes, sir, even I am afraid of you.”
Dammerung put out a hand with a snap and a spark at his fingertips, and the light of the brazier leapt up doublefold, strong, driving back the sleepy darkness. “Good!” he growled. “All my sons should have a healthy fear of me."
Dammerung went out, his black figure like a shadow slipping from the shell-bubble of white in which I was caught as something in a spider’s web. As though feeling a tug on the invisible lines, lines like the ones between the stars of the Baron’s shield, I turned my head without knowing why and saw the chatelaine of the House of Antemeridian seated in the embrasure where she had been with Dammerung, the parcel on her knee, and a sealskin busy in her hands being wrapped round the box. At that moment she raised her eyes to the girl’s who stood waiting for her to finish. There was something in that look—
A hand touched my shoulder and I leapt an inch off the floor as I spun round, dead-white with surprise. Dammerung was beside me with his small smile as usual on his lips…but behind his eyes there was something, something looking down at me which I could not understand and which made my blood crawl cold back to my heart.
“Is it very bad, my lord?”
Dammerung raised an arm and began to unbutton and roll back a sleeve. “Let us say you are a man to fight against the odds,” he replied, “and leave it at that.”
Coeur de Leon nodded, turning his head on the pillow so that the coins of his mask slid, tinkling together, catching the light as a myriad of eyes blinking angry surprise.
“A curious mixture of rigidity and indulgence, that man.” Jennalaide turned the subject from her gown. “A great one for wanting things just so! and yet not at all mean in his abundance.” Her own brows flickered upon a thought. “I had not expected that of him. I had not expected that of any of you. You have always been painted in my mind as monsters and devils and things not quite real.”
“If you cut me,” Goddgofang said softly, “I will bleed.”
“And isn’t that the oddest thing?” she exclaimed, looking him suddenly in the face. “So concerned with this world and all its little people, petty and great and rich and poor and mean and taught and everything! yet somehow, upon the same coin,” her voice mellowed, “most detached from it. Most solid and real, upon meeting; and yet, when one goes to reach for you, one discovers you have in relation to this world all the halo and transience of a saint.”
“Hmm!” Goddgofang chuffed gently. “If distrust can make a monster of you, we are of all men most monstrous..."
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